honestly, it doesn't get any easier.

i saw this kid doing this. for a really long time. in front of a bunch of people. who laughed quietly as to not disturb him. he just kept rocking back and forth on top of his skateboard...on top of a chain. it was kind of hypnotic. like a fat kid on top of his skateboard. on top of a chain. i'm guessing "confused kid boner". it's a horrible age to be a boy. new and strange things are happening to your body and you don't know why. you only know it feels better when you mash it up against something firm. you have no idea what to do with it or how to make it go away. it's completely maddening. if only he knew it was just going to lead him straight into more confusion. some days you just kinda give up. which is my theory here.

after a while the kid's dad noticed he kind of had an audience of lot-sauced a-holes, and promptly scooped him up. i must make clear that i didn't actually think about this theory until today. that particular day i just happened to act like i was throwing something in the trash can near this kid and snapped the picture with my phone. hi, i'm a dickhead. anyhoo, that's that. catch you on the flippity floppity.